Goodbye Chengdu

Today we said goodbye to Chengdu. It is hard to know that our son is leaving behind his birth land with so much history, his culture, his people, his language, his heritage, his home for the last 24 months. We hope and pray that the LORD will keep Chengdu close to his heart and that the memories he has collected will always be with him even as he grows older. As I look out over Chengdu, I can only imagine what life for Yang Yang would have been here. Susie tells us he would have had to work very hard in school because he is coming from an orphanage to prove he deserved more education. She said perhaps he would work or go to school. But the truth sits outside our hotel, a man begging for money his face weathered by time and hardship and missing his left leg below the knee. For far too many disabled, this is their future in China. For in a country with billions vying for jobs, education, opportunities, success, marriage, and futures, those that are outwardly different are easily left behind if they are unable to work hard to prove themselves capable or denied the education they would need to find success.

Over the last couple of days, the stares of strangers at our son's arm have become uncomfortable for us and are again confirmation that differences in China have not yet moved from unlucky curiosities to tolerance to daily acceptance. Not yet, but who knows what the culture of China is capable of changing. The 20-something guide at the museum was a surprising example of the new generations take on an old Chinese custom. She told an ancient story to us and mentioned that many Chinese think it is better to have a son, "But I think this is not wise. Because if no girls then no girls or boys, we must have girls too." Perhaps changes are closer than we think.

Families understanding the fallacy in only keeping sons have begun to cherish the news of a daughter. David and I witnessed many families touring Chengdu with beautiful little girls - babies, toddlers, and school aged girls. We also saw a mother holding a baby with microtia of the ear. In McDonald's, we noticed two teen boys using sign language.  Another young man at the airport with a significant birthmark (a port stain) on the back of his neck. The reason these encounters stood out as significant is that all around us are outwardly "perfect people" and unlike our country with so much diversity, here the differences stand out all the more.

Dealing with all the comments and stares have made me wonder about how he will be treated in the U.S. too. I realize it isn't every day you see someone with a limb difference. I guess what I wish I could tell others is that he is just like them. He loves to play, to laugh, and to eat yummy food. He wants to feel safe, to feel loved, to feel needed, and to know he is accepted just as he is. Believe me, I know people can be cruel in every country. Unwanted comments and stares are sure to abound. I have a feeling I will be constantly choosing between education, compassion, or Momma Bear protection mode when it comes to how others treat our son. My prayer for him is that he will grow to love Jesus with all of his heart and find in Him his identity, his self-worth, his confidence, and his future hope!The truth about my son is that he was perfectly made. And when he asks me why God made his arm different, I will smile and tell him "So that we could find you." Because in a country with thousands of orphans waiting to be adopted, only his differences helped him to stand apart. It was his arm that allowed our paths to cross and God's timing and grace that orchestrated every detail.

It is always hard for me to say goodbye to those that have helped us with such a huge transition. Susie has been wonderful and has made our experience here in Chengdu so full and amazing. We have experienced so much of this place through her eyes and have found conversation with her to reveal so much about life in China. We were thrilled this morning when she brought her 3 yr. old son to meet us! He is so cute and it was fun to see her with him. After dropping us off at the Chengdu airport, they were both going to travel by train to visit her husband. He is a medical Dr. who works for the military and is currently working and studying for a Master's degree in a different city. I couldn't imagine being away from my husband for long stretches like that, but this is the way of life in China. Many husbands work away from home to provide for their families. Susie also brought Mason a gift! An adorable litte shirt! :) We were so thankful to have her with us for this week! From taking us to the hot pot, Jin Li Street, the Pandas, the Opera, and most importantly helping us to facilitate the adoption of our wonderful son, we are so thankful for God answering our prayers to send us a guide that would be equipped to help us! David told her if she ever travels to the US that she is welcome in our home anytime! She smiled and said thank you and that she would love to visit America some day.

After breakfast, we took George Mason for one last walk outside around the hotel block and took a few photos of the surrounding buildings. Chengdu is a city of millions! Building upon building line the streets for as far as the eye can see. Somewhere beyond the concrete towers and bumper to bumper traffic there are fertile farmlands growing rice, corn, cabbage and the famouse Sichuan red peppers. A train connects Chengdu proper with the outskirts of suburbs - north to south and east to west. The trains meander along tracks through the landscape of Sichuan bringing wares and tourists and workers to their final destinations.

Though he couldn't have known that morning where he would end up, such a small babe lovingly wrapped in the only blankets a peasant's wage could afford, he boarded the train nonetheless carried in the arms of his birthfather. For our son, his journey to us would include twists and turns that no child should ever have to endure - deep sacrifices of love and heartache, grieving and sorrow, and prayers for hope and cries for help, but all the while God's protection and His grace. The final destination for little Yang Yang who boarded Passenger Car #11 on the train bound for Chengdu would not end in a city, but rather in a family. Our family. How deeply I wish that somehow, someway, those that brought him into this life could know that he is alive and well, and we are so blessed to love him. We say our goodbyes to Chengdu with hearts that will be eternally grateful for the honor of being chosen as his mother, his father, so thankful for the gift we've been given, always knowing the cost that was paid by those that chose a new life for him - a life full of possibilites.